Hello everyone and Happy New Year!
I am a bit late with this of course, it being the 9th, but I’ve been taking my time. I think that has become my theme for 2019, at least for now, as I find myself often going against my instinct and just slowing down. This is not to say that I am not working at hard or anything like that. I just want to slow down. Take my time. Take it all in. It’s not so much of a resolution as a revolution of mindsets, if you will.
Resolution always sounded to abrupt and final to me. As though the new year would magically make something happen or that I would suddenly change in a major way. It’s too much pressure and I have several people talking to me about it and how it makes them depressed. This is in fact counter productive because the plan for the New Year was supposed to be positive change or transformation. Now, so many are feeling depressed with the holidays being over, Christmas feeling like a small figure in the rearview mirror, and resolutions are not going as planned. Well, here is my take.
- Every Day can be a transformative day. At any point in the year, you can find that a big thing happens, good or bad, that changes you. At any point, you can have a day that stands out and that will be one of the major memories when you ring in 2020. Essentially, though I love celebrating entering a new year and all the fireworks that come with it, I am a firm believer in remembering that 2019 is a WHOLE new year. 365 possibilities and opportunities for big things. Also, 365 days chances of mundane things.
- Take the New Year as a chance to observe and work toward change. Do not expect the new year to be what changes you. Now, I know that we don’t expect the year to change us, or at least we think we don’t. But many actually do. They think that the new year will be their chance to change their ways. That it’s a blank slate. Why is that? Well, the main reason is that instead of going over patterns and habits we know of but don’t necessarily understand, we rather write over them with a “new beginning”. This can last for a bit maybe, but it is not from within. “fake it until you make it” doesn’t always work. Equally, when there is no visible change, you start to feel discouraged and depressed, in ways that have nothing to do with your ability or potential, nor about where you will actually end up if you just do what you need to do. This feeling will actually make you postpone what you probably would have eventually done.
- Something has to mean enough to you. It won’t be the new year that will give you motivation. Not truly. You have to link it with something that means enough to you. Then, you can use the new year as you big jump into a new routine, but ultimately, so much internal work is done without the New Year being involved.
- Sometimes it takes more than a change of year. Sometimes, one is depressed, or grieving, or ill and it’s a more complicated and painful process. This will seem like an obvious reason why a new year makes no difference, perhaps, because the situation may be out of one’s control. However, this is true and false. Most of all, it applies to “less complex” situations as well. This people can decide that this is the year they take matters into their own hands or at the very least, change the way they approach what they cannot control. Similarly, someone may decide that this is the year they stop smoking, or that they start running every day. No matter how big or small a resolution or desired change may seem, both require internal meaning and understanding in order to be realised. The New Year is but a construct to help us separate, categorise, and feel inspired.
- I recommend only letting it inspire you and not let it have control over you. This may seem obvious but it isn’t. The new year should inspire, just as I find new seasons do. But it should stop there. You have your own journey and your own internal clock and unless you follow your pace and your journey, there will always be resistance, and sooner or later, that resistance will cause you to be discouraged, and eventually feel depressed. Allow to be inspired, but not persuaded away from your truth.
The important thing is, that for better or for worse, it is just a new year, and though containing a certain sparkle, the magic lives in YOU.
Happy living everyone!